Armed siege

It's official! I'm all over the place! My music software continues not to work, and I can feel the clock ticking down on the Yorkshire commission. The bottom line is that a month ago, I invested a large amount of money in software that simply doesn’t work on my new laptop. The soundcard is not of a high enough calibre and when I play anything back, all I can hear is static. Worse still, no one seems to be able to help me. I feel sick and I feel angry and right now I’m having to force myself not to scream into a pillow. I’m wasting hours and hours that I just don’t have to spare. Today I’ve visited PC Worlds in Moorgate and Tottenham Court Road, and right now, Nathan is in a store in Stevenage! It’s been one long wild goose chase. If I wasn't so stressed, I'd be laughing.


Great Britain woke up to a hung Parliament this morning, which is interesting but not altogether surprising. That inane Scottish woman, Lorraine Kelly tried to tell me all about it on GMTV but I was forced to switch over because her chirpy “och, enough about you, let’s talk about me” was making me want to punch the television. I’ve tried incredibly hard to like that woman. She’s very pro-gay, and, according to my mate, (who admittedly could bull-shit for England) is often viewed staggering around Heaven holding a bottle of poppers whilst yelling about how much she loves queens.

But I digress...

Hornsey and Wood Green has remained Liberal Democrat, but elsewhere the support for the party seems to have flat-lined, largely due to our ridiculous electoral system which forces us all to vote tactically. My little outburst in the Polling Station was categorically trumped by, of all things, an armed siege later in the day. The story hasn’t yet made the headlines so I can’t think it was a particularly successful siege. Quite why they decided to raid a polling station in an Arts Centre in Highgate, I’ve no idea. Perhaps they were carrying comedy water pistols and were actually members of the Monster Raving Loony party. Perhaps it was some kind of protest against the lack of literature available regarding candidates in the council election. Or tragically, maybe some wise guy with a sawn-off shotgun figured that the vegetarian café in the complex would be doing a roaring trade on election day!

It still feels very odd and more than a little upsetting to see Midlands towns like Corby and Nuneaton turning blue. I appreciate that all the parties are the same nowadays, but even the word Tory makes my blood start to run cold. I am, however, extremely proud of the good citizens of Brighton Pavilion, who will shortly deliver the first ever Green MP to the house. Roll on electoral reform. We need more mavericks in Parliament!

It was a rather jolly day on board the Nazeby on May 7th 1660. The ship was full to the rafters with dignitaries, having evidently been selected as the boat that would eventually bring Charles II back to England. But there was much to do in the meantime. Flags bearing the King’s arms would need to be made and everything had to be spruced up and decorated with the monarch’s colours. Pepys was given the task of booking a barge of musicians and perhaps, as a thank you, was presented with 12 bottles of Margate ale, much of which he consumed during the day. Mr Shepley and William Howe joined him in his cabin at the end of the night and the three men drank and giggled like school boys until 1am.