Beeping woman

Whilst waiting in the car park at the gym today, a rather horrid woman pulled up in a car behind me. I took no notice. I was first in the queue and was simply waiting for a space to become available. The woman, however, was plainly a princess, and obviously felt she was too important to sit and wait in a queue. I suspect she thought there was a space in the car park which I hadn't seen, but instead of tapping on my window, or pulling up next to me, she started beeping her horn impatiently. I ignored her, and glanced in my wing mirror to see her gesturing angrily and wildly at me. Eventually, she gave up and screeched past me into the car park at high speed, flipping me the bird in the process. What a cow!

Twenty seconds later she was reversing aggressively obviously realising there was no space after all, and slightly embarrassed by her behaviour. Imagine my mirth, therefore, when she reversed the car into a wooden bollard!

It didn't do a great deal of damage, but everyone in the car park went running over to her. She was having none of it, however, and speedily exited the car park. Obviously getting away from the scene of mortification was more important than a gym work-out!

I had an amusing text this evening.

"I know this may seem a strange text, but we need your help to settle a family debate. We are fans of your work but argue over a small part over your Tyne & Wear Metro musical. Does the guy who had "a one way ticket to the States" get asked on a date by a he or a she? Thanks in advance, Steve."

I responded to say that the guy in question was most definitely singing about a she. "It might be the campest film in the world, but there are one or two straight guys in it! Is this good news or bad?"

"It's bad. Very bad as my one daughter and I have been arguing it has he with my wife, son and other daughter. We've certainly been proven wrong by the person would know the definitive answer! Thanks for the reply, I hope my text didn't weird you out too much. I wasn't actually expecting a reply, figured it would be the number of a PR rep or something."

I was genuinely touched to think a whole family had been watching the film. Turns out they're from Wolverhampton and have followed my work since Coventry Market: The Musical.

Metro still generates more comments and emails than any of my other films. It's so interesting to see how it divides people. 50% love it. 50% think it epitomises crap TV! It used to really upset me, but nowadays I'm actually just thrilled that people are still commenting on it, and that 70,000 have watched it online, which by my calculations mean 35,000 loved it! That aint to be sniffed at!