Thursday, 13 October 2016

Those charming Danes

I woke up yesterday to the most charming email from a lady in Denmark, where they've apparently just broadcast our wedding on telly. It's apparently also due to be screened somewhere in the Francophone world because Nathan's seen a clip translated into French. I have to say, I still find it staggering that they're broadcasting the piece so many years later and that it's still affecting people around the world. The only thing which upsets me is how irrelevant some of the politicians will seem. I was always very upset that they cut into Alison Jiear's rendition of Yellow for silly messages of good will from Nick Clegg and one of the Miliband brothers. No one knows who they are in the UK anymore, let alone Norway, and they weren't part of the narrative of the film, just greedy attempts to gild the celebrity lily.

Anyway, the email I received was so charming that I feel it merits being repeated, in full, here. 

"Dear Benjamin and Nathan ! At last this week they send Nathan's and your wonderful wedding in Danish television. Congratulations at occasion of your day, it was so wonderful to see it, I cried like a little baby. I saw it 8 times also with my mother, she enjoyed it so much It was so touching and such a fantastic wedding and the music was so amazing. I do hope, I can be married one day as you in a musical. I also saw it with my daughter at 12 years, and she said, and we were agreed, that we hope one day we can meet you and give you the biggest hug in the world. It gave me also an opportunity to tell my daughter about the right to married, no matter what kind of sex you are, and the right everybody has to love each other, and we talk about that it is so terrible to know, that in some countries they punish lovers. We give you and Nathan the best hope for the future and a very big hug from to big fans I Denmark. Love and hug from Charlotte."

The fact that she'd taken time to write in a foreign language was incredibly touching. I instantly started feeling bad about Brexit, but read up on Denmark to discover that they have a fairly complicated relationship with the EU, so forced myself not to feel so bad.

My desire to apologise to Europeans about Brexit knows no bounds. I don't really know why: we're already being brutally punished for our back-stabbing cowardice, and the forecasts are increasingly gloomy. Tesco have temporarily stopped selling Marmite, Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Pot Noodle because Unilever want to add something like 20% to the cost. And yet you continually hear those tragic bastards saying it will all be okay, or more desperately, that "Brexit was alright" like the sodding thing has already happened.

First off, I propose a ban of anyone who voted Brexit from visiting mainland Europe. We can't take the risk that the wrong people will go there. Right now we need to have intelligent, decent ambassadors for this country travelling over there, not stupid people and those who'll feel the need to aggressively argue that the Brits did the right thing, without any working knowledge of politics or the economy. I wonder if anyone is yet regretting the way they voted or whether they've all still got their heads buried in the sand. I would actually have so much respect for someone who held their hands up and actually acknowledged that they wished they'd voted differently.

I dreamed last night that I'd temporarily moved to a house by the sea which immediately flooded. Maybe I heard the rain in the night. Nathan was simultaneously dreaming about bats.

Yesterday trickled by with very little consequence. I worked on two songs: one from Em and one for something else.

We made biscuits for Bake Off, and, predictably, burned the first batch to little flaky pieces of charcoal. I don't know what's wrong with us. The recipe says to cook them for twenty minutes, but they seem to burn after ten. I think. We never bother to time them really, and always get caught up doing something else whilst they're in the oven.

The second batch were undercooked, and a bit chewy, but I didn't have enough butter, so I guessed all the measurements and kept on adding sugar and flour until the dough looked about right.

I tried to decorate them with a concoction I made out of marmalade, dried cranberries, lemon juice and sugar, boiled up in a pan. It tasted bitter and weird, so I coated them in chocolate - and then icing made with lemon juice and icing sugar. They weren't good!

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