Werther's Originals

There's an advert on the telly for Werther's Originals, where the voice-over talks about going to visit her "favourite caramel shop" as a child. A caramel shop? A shop which sells caramel? Nothing but caramel? And this was her FAVOURITE caramel shop. Like there's a caramel shop on every freakin corner! 

I have googled "caramel shop". They don't exist. Of course they don't exist. Caramel is horrid. 

I can just imagine the brainstorming session they had when they came up with that advert....

- The brief says high end. 

- Ya. High end. Ya, like loads of like golden wrappers glinting like gold. Ya? Like magical...

- Let's brainstorm magical...

- okay. Okay. Tragical. Vagical.  

- Harry Pottical

- That's it! 

-  Can we get the Harry Potter music? 

- Totes impossible. We try for it on every campaign

- Better get a second rate producer to try and rip it off, then?

- Natch...

- So Harry Pottical enters a golden sweet shop...

- Too machismo

- Harriet Pottical enters a sweet shop 

- I like it

-  Ya, but a sweet shop is not specific or magical enough...

- What's this an advert for?

- Worthingtons
- Werther's, div...

- What do they make?

- Um...

- Does anyone know what they make?

- Caramel sweeties for paedophiles... Remember, we had to ditch the old man from the ads.

- Totes creepsome

- Utterly buttery

- A caramel shop!

- That's it! Harriet Pottical goes into a golden caramel shop...

- Make it personal...

- Her FAVOURITE childhood caramel shop

- I love it!

- Do caramel shops exist?

- Small detail, peeps. We deal with the big ideas...

- Bingo!

- Coolio. Stop the clock. How long was that? 

- 5 minutes.

- Call it £100k? 

- Mega... I'll call Worthington's with the good news...

- What's next?

- Um. London 2012 need a logo...

- Shit... 

- Better get the school kids in on this one...

I've just passed a 60-year old woman with a 2 inch, shiny black tattoo of a dog's paw on her cheek! It was a horrifying sight which posed more questions than there are answers for. What was she thinking of? What was she attempting to cover up? Did her grandchildren do it to her with a sharpie pen whilst she was asleep? Answers on a post card.